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  1. #1
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    Nov 2010
    le Paris
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    Alpina B7 test drive

    The lack of activity made me to write this article specially that writing in English for a retarded Persian person like me is the hardest job.

    Anyway, a body of mine after rubbing people finally got the money to buy an Alpina B7 and since I know a way to get the key of all cars ( kick in the balls and while the person bends over, punch in the face ) i went for a test drive.


    In my opinion, behind an ugly car, there is someone genius as the designer because designing ugly cars is really hard. the all time genius in BMW scene is Chris Bangle who with previous gen 7-Series, showed the world for the first time that BMW's can be ugly as hell too. However, the current gen 7-Series is a nice car. so Alpina designers didn't have to change many parts to make B7 a good looking car and the fact is, it is a good looking car. the front lip is life changer, i'm still wondering how a plastic can change the look of a car from good to best. from side view, the awesome 21 inch wheels shine like a diamond. However since the test car was a B7 L, you always wonder in exactly what hour you will reach the end of the car ( read this sentence as a bad point of the design ). finally you are looking to the car at back, what you see is normal 7-series with real quad exhaust and if you pay attention like an eagle, you will find the Akrapovic logo on tips which cool as hell.


    In first time you may say it's a normal 7 with blue tacho and speedo and some other minor features. But if you look closer, you will hear details saying " hey $#@!, it's an Alpina ". the fit and finish is absolutely marvelous compared to the 740i i drive. the wood on dash of my car is nice, but the wood in this thing is just beautiful.
    same story about leather on seats, you never want to fart on those beautiful seats.


    after sitting on those comfy i closed the door, started the engine but noise was low so i opened the door to check if the engine is actually started. revved the engine but the exhaust sound wasn't that great, even a 740i sounds better. put the lever in D and started driving. with 21 inch wheels i expected a harsh ride but the ride was smooth and at the same time it gave me the confident that it's not a big fat lazy car.

    this was the boring part of the test, after that i went to treat the car like $#@! but First i want to give you a picture of the street the office is located. it's a tight street with so many expensive cars parked and people who can't drive like real humans. it's a street you never want to speed up in it. But, I was so relaxed in B7 that set the fastest speed in that street with 140 KM/H. it's really easy to speed up with this car, only if you look at speedo you will realize your actual speed.
    0-100 Km/h was like 5 seconds which for a 2 ton car and the $#@!ty gasoline we have here is amazing. the engine response is great, you even won't notice it's a FI engine. the power is always there, always.
    The steering is good, but not great. I'm not going to defend the car by saying " it's good for it's weight " because this thing is OMG heavy. and the electric assist is Meh. IDK why manufactures prefer electric assist over proper hydraulic assist steering.

    Fuel efficiency? does really somebody want to know the MPG of B7 here?
    and BTW the braking is goood, and they have to be gooood because you are going to pay $130000 for a car not a killing machine.

    Click here to enlarge

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Sugar Land, Tx
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    OMG super sweet.. I always love the B7..

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